More on Dr Phil
I've been working my way through his book some more, something I've been meaning to do for two months now. The last chapter I just read was "Key Four: Mastery Over Food and Impulse Eating". Can't say this is my biggest challenge in losing weight, because I have so many challenges, lol! But several things struck me reading this chapter.
Step three in this chapter talks about changing your eating style. So many of the bad habits go waaay back, or are seated in my emotions.
Fast eating. Yep, I gulp my food down, am done a meal in five minutes. Not that it's a time-saver or anything, goes back to when I was Bella's age. I used to sit near my dad at the dinner table. I was a total little chatterbox, and he had a short fuse. When he'd had enough of my incessant chatter, he'd reach out and belt me one. Not that we're talking abuse, he never ever beat me, but he'd give me a good slap. Mum ended up rearranging the seating for some reason, but at the root of it was the need to get me sitting farther away from Dad. Personally I don't remember it, but my older brother told me about it later in life. All I know is that I didn't enjoy meal times as a family. We weren't allowed to talk, just sit and listen to Mum and Dad talk about his day. He was king of the household. So I'd gulp my food down as fast as I could, in the hopes of escaping the table fast. And when I hit high school, and got a part time job, I rarely came home for dinner, even if I was finished before then.
Eating oversize portions. I know, if I don't make an effort, that I eat too much at a meal. Food doesn't just fill an empty stomach. Learned that when I was little too. My dad, while he loved us, didn't know how to show affection, other than by being too rough. A big bear hug that squeezed your ribs so tight they hurt. Tickling till you couldn't breathe but because you were still laughing he wouldn't stop. But he didn't relate to us well, so otherwise he kept a distance. Him being an alcoholic didn't help, but that's another whole discussion. My mum loved us too, but was a person who needed her personal space. Not a huggy person. Meanwhile I'm a person who craves touch. Never ever got enough of it as a child. Grew up feeling like there was this big empty hole inside me that needed filling. And I'd fill it with food. That hole is a lot smaller, but it's still there.
Overeating at parties or social events. I'm shy. And I know I have low self-esteem. Not uncommon in children of alcoholics. Put me in a party, and unless I can find someone I'm comfortable talking with, I'll end up round the food. Mmm, it tastes good. And when I'm uncomfortable that hole gets bigger. Besides, if you are eating, you don't have to talk, and have people realize how boring you are, if you can even think up anything to say.
Sigh. Lots of issues to work through. I need to go back to "Key Two: Healing Feelings". But I'm working on it. And they offer lots of strategies to deal with the physical side of these bad habits.
On we move.
I've been working my way through his book some more, something I've been meaning to do for two months now. The last chapter I just read was "Key Four: Mastery Over Food and Impulse Eating". Can't say this is my biggest challenge in losing weight, because I have so many challenges, lol! But several things struck me reading this chapter.
Step three in this chapter talks about changing your eating style. So many of the bad habits go waaay back, or are seated in my emotions.
Fast eating. Yep, I gulp my food down, am done a meal in five minutes. Not that it's a time-saver or anything, goes back to when I was Bella's age. I used to sit near my dad at the dinner table. I was a total little chatterbox, and he had a short fuse. When he'd had enough of my incessant chatter, he'd reach out and belt me one. Not that we're talking abuse, he never ever beat me, but he'd give me a good slap. Mum ended up rearranging the seating for some reason, but at the root of it was the need to get me sitting farther away from Dad. Personally I don't remember it, but my older brother told me about it later in life. All I know is that I didn't enjoy meal times as a family. We weren't allowed to talk, just sit and listen to Mum and Dad talk about his day. He was king of the household. So I'd gulp my food down as fast as I could, in the hopes of escaping the table fast. And when I hit high school, and got a part time job, I rarely came home for dinner, even if I was finished before then.
Eating oversize portions. I know, if I don't make an effort, that I eat too much at a meal. Food doesn't just fill an empty stomach. Learned that when I was little too. My dad, while he loved us, didn't know how to show affection, other than by being too rough. A big bear hug that squeezed your ribs so tight they hurt. Tickling till you couldn't breathe but because you were still laughing he wouldn't stop. But he didn't relate to us well, so otherwise he kept a distance. Him being an alcoholic didn't help, but that's another whole discussion. My mum loved us too, but was a person who needed her personal space. Not a huggy person. Meanwhile I'm a person who craves touch. Never ever got enough of it as a child. Grew up feeling like there was this big empty hole inside me that needed filling. And I'd fill it with food. That hole is a lot smaller, but it's still there.
Overeating at parties or social events. I'm shy. And I know I have low self-esteem. Not uncommon in children of alcoholics. Put me in a party, and unless I can find someone I'm comfortable talking with, I'll end up round the food. Mmm, it tastes good. And when I'm uncomfortable that hole gets bigger. Besides, if you are eating, you don't have to talk, and have people realize how boring you are, if you can even think up anything to say.
Sigh. Lots of issues to work through. I need to go back to "Key Two: Healing Feelings". But I'm working on it. And they offer lots of strategies to deal with the physical side of these bad habits.
On we move.
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